Being Considerate at Work: The Key to Success

Welcome to The Subtle Shift, a weekly newsletter where I share subtle but powerful ideas to help you lead with clarity, inspire change, and create a lasting impact. This week, I wanted to share some thoughts on being considerate at work. More specifically, I wanted to explain what happens when we fail to be considerate.

Are You Inconsiderate?

I have a confession to make.

I can be inconsiderate.

For as long as I can remember, I’ve felt a bit selfish, and there has always been a quiet voice in the back of my mind telling me that I’m a bit too self-absorbed. I hope I don’t maliciously do this, but I tend to stay focused on my goals, my ideas, and my agenda. I don’t naturally identify as a “considerate” person and feel a bit ashamed of that.

But over the years, something became very clear to me: consideration isn’t just a personality trait; it’s a leadership skill.

It is something we can learn and develop.

Now, I don’t know about you, but the more I pay attention, the more I notice how much inconsiderate behavior is prevalent in the modern workplace. It’s not just loud or rude behavior. It’s subtle stuff. Rushed emails. Dismissive comments. Failing to listen because you’re already thinking about what’s next. These moments add up, and they cost us more than we think.

Inconsiderate Behavior Is Everywhere

David Brooks explained why in his fabulous book H ow to Know a Person:

“Over the past several decades, in particular, there’s been a loss of moral knowledge. Our schools and other institutions have focused more and more on preparing people for their careers, but not on the skills of being considerate toward the person next to you.”

David is right.

We’ve trained people to get results. But we haven’t taught them how to treat p eople. And the longer we let inconsiderate behavior slide, the more it chips away at our culture, our teams, and our leadership.

So today, we’ll explore three hidden costs that sneak up on you when consideration gets lost in the shuffle. By considering these costs, you can join the consideration bandwagon and start thinking about being considerate at work.

1. Disengagement In Disguise

When people don’t feel considered, they don’t speak up about it. Instead, they quietly check out.

They stop going the extra mile, stop bringing new ideas, and stop caring.

And what’s tricky is that this doesn’t always look like classic disengagement. People might still hit deadlines. They might still show up to meetings. But something’s missing, and you can feel it.

The energy drops. The ownership fades. The spark is gone.

And all of it traces back to small moments when people felt unseen, unheard, or unimportant.

2. Frustration Creates Friction

Inconsideration doesn’t always cause conflict, but it often causes friction.

That friction builds up and lingers in the background. If you’re not careful, it starts to shape how people talk (or don’t talk) to each other.

The truth is that inconsiderate behavior makes everything more complicated. Collaboration slows down. Feedback gets filtered. People start assuming the worst in each other instead of the best.

It doesn’t explode. It just simmers. And that’s what makes it dangerous.

3. Reputations That Work Against You

This one’s tough, but it needs to be said.

When you act in inconsiderate ways—whether you mean to or not—people notice. And over time, you build a reputation.

You become the person that others avoid. People stop trusting you with sensitive issues. Others hesitate to open up to or work closely with you because they know you are in it for yourself.

That kind of reputation doesn’t scream at you. It whispers behind your back.

And the worst part? You don’t realize it’s happening until your influence starts to fade.